log archive #1
|1.24.04 | 3:38am UNDER CONSTRUCTION|
Hello and welcome back--it's
like you never left, right? Anyway, after much thought and even some
rancor, I've come to the conclusion that I must have a yearly Best Of
list. Hey, if Larry King can do it, why not me? What I'll do
for 2003 is just present my picks for the best. For 2004, I'll
nominate one song, one film, one television episode, one television
series, one website, one DVD, one video game, one book, and one album per
month. Then, at the end of the year you can all vote for your pick
for the "Best of the Best!" (cue cheesy 80's soundtrack) Either that
or I'll just do it myself. Anyway, without further adieu, I give
FISCHER.NET'S BEST AND WORST OF 2003!
Best Song: OutKast
- Hey Ya!
Best Film: The Lord
of the Rings: Return of the King
Best Television Series:
Tough Crowd starring Colin Quinn - continues to be the funniest show on
Best Television Episode:
Best Website (other than
Best DVD: The Lord
of the Rings: The Two Towers (Extended Edition)
Best Video Game:
Grand Theft Auto - Vice City
Best Book: Touch
the Void by Joe Simpson - Much like "Into Thin Air" by Jon Krakauer a few
years back, "Touch the Void" presents another harrowing story of survival
in the face of harrowing circumstances. Inspirational to say the
least, one of those stories that makes you realize how trivial our
day-to-day lives have become. Kind of depressing if you approach it
that way, but you catch my drift.
|1.10.04 | 2:27am|
Happy New Year, everybody.
Hope you all had a great time New Year's Eve. I was able to contain
myself and get mildly drunk for the festivities at Bossman's. I
think he was more trashed that night than I could ever hope to be.
And Ross--damn those were some good nachos.
Still plugging away at
Adelphia--although there may be some promising news coming soon by way of
Pratt & Whitney. I'll keep you posted.
|12.31.03 | 4:13am|
Well, howdy-dee people. 2004 is
coming soon to theaters near you; hard to believe the year went by that
fast. As I've had myriad chances to peruse the length and breadth of
the Internet during my exceptionally boring shifts at Adelphia, I've come
upon countless "Years-in-Review" on site after site. So, in the
interest of "fitting in" with the rest of the 'net, I present to you,
without further adieu, the Fischer.Net Year in Review!
Somewhere in here is a trip to the Madden Estate in Amherst--or wherever it is--near Buffalo for what proved to be a regrettable night for Mr. Fischer. I'm sure you've all seen the pictures (if not, thank Jebus), so I won't elaborate too much more.
Looking back on the year, it
seems a rather unremarkable one--even with the graduation and new job,
can't say it's been one for the record books. Nevertheless, the new
year always brings opportunity for a new beginning, a new career, a new
car, a new dog, a new yard full of squirrels, a new outlook on life, a new
website, a new haircut, a new weight, a new pony (!), and a chance to make
up for past mistakes. Here's hoping you all have a great new
year--make it one to remember.
|12.25.03 | 2:59pm|
Christmas! Happy Hannukkah! Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Polish
Christmas! Happy Festivus!
hurts my eyes!
|12.13.03 | 2:19am|
Well, it seems that over the last three months, site traffic has grown ridiculously high (relative to the three and a half hits per month I used to get). And now, I find it only fitting that it's taken me two months to create an update. So, without further adieu, a couple months' worth of ramblings...
Due to the hours I've been working (usually getting done around 2:30am), pretty much the only thing to do when I get home is watch an assload of TV and have some delicious CHIPS. There's not much to do other than watch TV or work on my soon-to-be-release memoirs, Shanty: A Special Boy. All this brain-rotting activity has given me the opportunity to find a few new favorite shows I now count amongst my "can't miss" programming.
1. Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn - If you want some real insight into how hateful and envious standup comics are, look no farther. This is probably one of the three funniest shows on television, and I think it's the first time I've actually enjoyed something Colin Quinn has done. My go-to Tough Crowd lineup: Nick DiPaolo, Jim Norton, Patrice O'Neal, and Greg Giraldo....nonstop laughs guaranteed.
2. Howard Stern on E! - Yeah, I know, it's lowbrow, but is there anything funnier than watching a revolting fat guy get spun around on a wheel to determine whether or not a dumbass stripper is going to get whacked on the ass with a giant fish? I think not; call me crazy.
3. The Daily Show with Jon Stewart - Who knew wry cynicism could be so hilarious. Seriously, if Jon Stewart gets any funnier, he will explode in a violent display or sarcasm.
4. Around the Horn/Pardon the Interruption - There are few things I enjoy more than Woody Paige attempting to talk about hockey, baseball, or basketball and sounding like a blithering idiot; and Tony Kornheiser slowly building to a near fever-pitch rant about the Trampoline Bear or "his boy," Steve Spurrier.
Guilty Pleasure of the Week: the Mortal Kombat theme.
Line of Fire: new show on ABC. I like where this show appears to be heading--here's hoping some gutless executives at ABC don't get within a hundred miles of it and try to tone it down so it's like every other crappy show on television.
24: Has any show become more disappointing than this one? I swear to christ, I think the writers fell off the dumbass truck on the way to Stupidtown. Do they really think their audience consists of 5-year old, blabbering idiots? ;lakj;gblakhb;lkhbg; Start writing for a post-4th grade audience please, you douchebags.
Jon Stewart has gotten so funny he will soon implode and become Don Imus. (I guess I should've mentioned that earlier).
I've been working at Adelphia now for a few months, recently getting promoted to the "Chat" Team. Basically, I no longer have to listen to the hideously unintelligent Kentuckyians (no offense to the ones who at least have an 8th grade education) talk about their "rooters" and why they won't work because there's cat shit all over them. Instead, I get to endure enlightening conversations as follows (and I shit you not, this is verbatim from earlier today):
How are we doing, is anything coming up?
Yes, as I said, you need to open another Explorer window and type in
5 more minutes pass...
How are we doing, did you get to the page?
Okay, let's try this one more time, make sure it only says
"webmail.adelphia.net" (w/o the quotes) in the address bar.
5 minutes pass...
fmunoz: It's asking me for my username and password.
Jeff explodes for the second time.
Yes, go ahead and log in.
Jeff readies gun to kill himself...
Jeff: No, log
in with your username and password and you should see your Inbox.
8 days pass...
find messages, poll accounts, poll all accounts
5 more interminable minutes
How are we doing.
On the aeronautical engineering front, no news to report. I'm beginning to believe that planes will no longer be utilized in the future, everyone will travel in tubes. That Bachelor of Science degree sure has come in handy thus far. Seriously, however, I'm gearing back up for the job search and plan to head out west as soon as possible so I can concentrate on some of the firms in Washington and California. I may meet up with the Dubester so he can show me the set of ER and get me a role as a homeless drifter high on crystal meth.
Buffalo Bills -- anyone still remember 31-0?
RIP Grandma Fischer - go Pitt
Pearl Jam Update: Live at the Garden and Lost Dogs in stores now--why don't you have six copies of each already?
Is there anything more irritating than ID3 tags?
Anyone gonna be home in December for the holidays? I haven't been drunk for at least four months, and I think I'm due. Hope all is well in your neck of the woods.
Damn, that update was deceptively long. Hope you enjoyed, b/c it's all you guys are gonna get for a while. Stay tuned for some music and movie reviews, if you're lucky. Until next time, keep watching the stars and hoping you don't get mauled by a bear. Later.
|10.1.03 | 8:56pm|
Back after quite an absence, I come bearing news of all sorts. Okay, not really, just a quick update actually. I've been working at Adelphia for a while now and getting into the swing of things. Aside from the occasional barking dog drowning out all conversation, I've gotten to enjoy working on the phones and helping slack-jawed yokels learn the intricacies of turning their monitor on. Fun stuff.
Since my last update, the Bills haven't done quite as well as I might've liked, falling to the decrepit Dolphins and equally challenged Eagles. There's only one surefire cure for the team's late woes: the Cincinnati Bengals. Here's hoping for 42-0 this Sunday.
I've update a few sections of the site and am working feverishly on fixing the image gallery. I've seen a jump in hits as of late, mainly due to my compatriots from Red Mosquito. Welcome to the land of all things Fischer!
And for all you EA "chums," feel free to drop me a line, I've seen a few queries from some unknown IP addresses and am curious as to their true identity. That's all for now, stay tuned...
|9.7.03 | 4:52pm|
|9.5.03 | 5:00pm|
Well, a new look was hinted at in the Site Evolution and here it is! Borrowing heavily from the University at Buffalo website, this new look promises to be a bit more sophisticated (read: more difficult to navigate but looks damn good) and professional. I'll be working out myriad tweaks over the next month, hopefully culminating in a new web domain (gotta secure it first) and all new sections sure to amaze you.
In the meantime, check out the different departments and let me know if something's not working--and let me know what you think!
|8.24.03 | 12:48am|
Howdy, folks. Fat Jak Jones was back in town at the beginning of last week, so we took a jaunt up to Bossman's Los Robles estate. It's nice to see that, almost six years after graduating high school and a year removed from college, that we still act like 12-year olds whenever we get back together. What do I mean by that? Well, all we needed to entertain ourselves was a weak flashlight and the belief that we were surrounded by skunks that sounded like rattlesnakes. Need I say more? Anyway, it was a good time.
Also, check out Reno 911 on Comedy Central; best new show on television.
Back after a bit of an absence (although I'm back in a much shorter time than what you might expect from Moskimonster's or Biff's websites), and there are a few things to update you on. As I mentioned on the 10th, my WPJAA Tour is finally over after the last stop in Hershey, Pennsylvania. The show was great, you can read the review when I get it up, but the focus here will be on Hersheypark itself.
Hersheypark was founded in 1822 by midgets with an unnatural affinity for bad skin...no, seriously it was founded by lemurs.
Anyway, the place is a lot like Six Flags, except instead of concession stands where you might find soda or water or some hot dogs, there are stands that sell nothing but Hershey bars, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, Mars bars, and chocolate milk. Sounds great, you say? HAH! Uh, well, it is great, although the lack of hot dogs is disturbing. Anyway, there was a new candy stand every time you would turn around, and the size of the portions was ridiculous. I think the Hershey bars ranged in offerings from the weight of a newborn calf to over a metric ton. Amazing stuff. Alas, I have no pictures of any of this so you'll just have to take my word for it--or go to the Hersheypark website and admire the endless mounds of acne-inducing goodness.
My job search is still ongoing, with trips to Lockheed-Martin and Boeing upcoming. I've updated my resume, so hopefully that will be the final piece of the puzzle that rockets me to the top of the aerospace industry in a blaze of ultimate glory. OR--not. Regardless, I'll let you know how it goes.
I'd also like
to reiterate how good Pearl Jam is: Pearl Jam is damn good.
Dear lord what a coupla days in NYC. I'm thrillingly exhausted, all ready for Hershey on Saturday to close my Whiz-bang Pearl Jam Across America Tour, hope you've all enjoyed it as much as I have. I'll probably post a few wrap-up thoughts after Saturday's review goes up. Until then, I'll be hibernating...
I should also
mention I am just about out of web space, so if anyone out there can
provide a temporary home for Fischer.Net (preferably with an assload of
free space handy), please let me know ASAP. I just need something to tide
me over until I decide upon a domain name (dogs-on-minibikes.gov, anyone?)
Check out the Pearl Jam section
for my Montreal review.
I'm heading down to NYC on Monday for a rip-roaring two-night Pearl Jam extravaganza in Madison Square Garden. Should be a great two nights.
I also just
got back from Groton, Connecticut for a job interview with General
Dynamics' Electric Boat division (they make nuclear subs for the Navy
Crimson Tide-style wooo!), and it went great. So, in a month or two I
could be the newest employee of the U.S. government, so watch yo' back,
|6.27.03 8:53pm - J'ai besoin de mon Pearl Jam!|
Yo-ho-ho. I'm off to Potsdam tomorrow to pick up some more stuff from school and then it's once again time for Pearl Jam in lovely downtown Montreal. I'll have a full report of the weekend's festivities when I get back on Monday.
Once again, I
am advertising the availability of tickets for one of the New York shows.
Turns out I'm gonna be staying with Dannyboy in his extravagant 5th avenue
|6.21.03 8:37pm - "i got my time machine, got my 'lectric dream"|
Sorry, I'm in the middle of listening to the Buffalo Pearl Jam show. Good stuff.
Anyway, I'm fresh back from Chicago to see the aforementioned greatest band in the world; my review and some pictures are up in the Pearl Jam section. I've added a couple of shows to my "itinerary" so if you're interested, let me know, tickets are still available, and if I don't hear from my faithful readers soon they're going to eBay!
Montreal 6/29: working
I added a couple of pictures to the Buffalo Pearl Jam gallery. Enjoy. That's all for now.
Heading to Chicago tomorrow for
The ticket tally as of today:
Again, let me
know if interested, they're going to be $40 to 50 for each ticket; if
someone decides to go to both New York shows, I'll let the tix for those
two shows go for $30 each; although the hotel cost will still factor in,
unless you want to sleep in an ATM vestibule. More as it develops...ciao.
|6.10.03 - Take a bottle, drink it down... [UPDATED]|
Some sections of the site have been taken down for maintenance and space considerations, so bear with "us" as "we" at Fischer.Net make a few changes. Currently at work on overhauling Pearl Jam section, adding a "Film Review etc." section, keep checking back for a few other surprises.
I should note that no one was able to find the latest incarnation of the Secret Page without my help, so I had to show Dirty Frank (P.J.) where it is. With its location disclosed, I've been forced to change its location and links. For the record, the link was the 'Hail, Hail' link on the No Code album page in the Pearl Jam section. I dropped a clue in the "Secret Link" page, which linked off of the Links page. It was so damn easy. Losers.
In far more
important news, I have been relentlessly pursuing Pearl Jam tickets for
the 6/18 Chicago show, the 7/8 and 7/9 New York City shows, and the 7/12
Hershey, PA show. The tally as of right now:
The job search is going none too well, NO ONE is hiring right now and out of the 350 or so resumes I've sent out, I've gotten replies from about 8% of the companies. GAH! One can only hope the aerospace industry picks up and right soon or there'll be hell to pay if I'm working as an airport janitor a year from now....hmm, that actually sounds promising--mop and bucket here I come!
Added some stuff.
plan a trip to NYC around the July 8-10 area (I've got tickets for the
Pearl Jam show there on the 9th and am trying to secure Letterman tickets
as well). Let me know if you're interested.
Added my Pearl Jam review from
May 2nd to the PJ page; read at your leisure.
Browse around for some of the
myriad other updates.
Okay, it's official, 'Matrix
Reloaded' kicks ass upon a second viewing. All who disagree can eat it.
|5.15.03 I just reloaded in my pants|
10pm: saw 'Matrix Reloaded'
12:25pm: finished watching 'Matrix Reloaded'
12:26pm: disappointed with 'Matrix Reloaded'
2:01am: need to see 'Matrix Reloaded' again because the more I think about it, the better the movie is
Word to the wise: don't judge
this movie 'til you've seen it twice...and
stick around for after the credits!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The day is finally here, I'll
let you know how it went.
|5.3.03 HOLY F**K!|
Damn. What a night. Just got back to Potsdam after seeing Pearl Jam in Buffalo last night. I'm still too shocked to write a review of the show--it was freakin' unbelievable...the best show I could have hoped for. More coming shortly...
Back with a brief update.
Finally done with classes here at Clarkson, what a bitterSWEET day that
was. Graduation is only 14 days away!
Reminder: Pearl Jam concert May 2nd, for those in Buffalo, we'll be arriving at my house around 4ish. Ross, pregaming at your place? Then we've gotta be at HSBC around 6, concert starts at 730ish, and then it's Chippewa time!
I added those images of us
stealing cars to the image gallery and updated the Song of the Week;
|4.20.03 4:49AM Real estate is the final frontier.......................................................|
i am NOT d-runk
had our last contact from JayMan I'm afraid. He's gone to Mongolia and
said he's not coming back. Apparently the real estate market is much more
lucrative in Mongolia. Best of luck, JayMan.
Well, I've heard some more from JayMan and, inexplicably, he seems to think that he is NOT Roger Daltrey. In an effort to humor him, I said "oh yeah, then who are you, chief?" To which he replied: "I'm Terry Tate, dammit!" I yelled "SUMBITCH!" and promptly hung up the phone. A short time later, I received a pic from him:
So hopefully this mystery is finally solved.
If you haven't seen the new trailer for The Matrix Reloaded, well HOT DAMN! Go get it!
In other news, I'm in the home stretch of my final year at Clarkson. Still no job and no real prospects, so I think I'm gonna collect cans for bottle returns for a while, sell squirrel hides, and prostitute my mind for a while until things pick up. Any suggestions you've got would be most appreciated.
Also tonight, we enacted Operation DUDEWHERESMYCAR with exciting and successful results. We had our annual TDK Founder's Day the past few days so this weekend a large tent was set up in the backyard for our "formal" dinner on Saturday night. The tent was still up today, so the thinking was we should steal some cars of unsuspecting brother in the house and put them inside the tent. It seemed the right thing to do. So I think we ended up with seven cars and sent an email under a false name and held the cars for ransom. I'll have some more pics up of that soon.
I'll be coming home May 2nd and 3rd for the Pearl Jam concert so if you wanna hit Chippewa Friday night, Ross will meet you at The Steer.
And in news I'm sure everyone will be relieved to hear, Julio Gutierrez was finally apprehended last Thursday by the Royal Canadian Air Force in Alberta. He had been on the lam for well over five years, leaving in his wake countless broken hearts and nuts. Only time will heal the wounds he's created with his devious and cowardly ways.
all for now, I should mention someone found the Secret Page, so I've
changed the links and hidden location a bit. The first one other than
Geoff to get me the URL will win a 1984 Buick LeSabre with 20-inch rims.
I have yet to
hear from anyone who has found the Secret Page; you're all pathetic so
I've had to add yet another clue somewhere on the site. Happy hunting.
(the first one to send me the correct URL of the page will receive five
tickets to Cats)
that I find something that makes me laugh out loud (Ross yelling out
"CHIPS!," Dan misspelling 'the,' a monkey washing a cat) but this made me
do just that so I thought I'd share it for one and all:
New Budweiser Ad (requires Windows Media
I've had a
few conversations with JayMa--I mean Roger Daltrey, and I am happy to
report that he is glad that his true identity is finally out in the open.
My guess is we'll never hear from him again, as he said he was traveling
to Ecuador for the Plaid Pants Convention. Godspeed, Roger!
Well, as you
can see, we've got some major updates underway. I'll be tweaking things
quite a bit in the next week. In the meantime, let me know what you
|4.1.03 7:13pm - U.S. ATTACKED BY ARMY OF RABID DOGS!!!|
Well, I was contacted by JayMan
a short time ago and it is time to reveal his identity:
it's none other than Roger Daltrey from The Who!!!!
|I added a
gallery of Bergin' pics from yesterday. Check 'em out!
In other news, I think I may have come upon the identity of the enigmatic "JayMan." Confirmation coming shortly...
Greetings, faithful readers. I'm back from a refreshing spring break in Phat Aurora, where it was, I'm happy to report, a balmy 65 degrees the day I arrived home. It nearly rivaled the 95 degrees of Cancun, but I didn't have to deal with dirty Mexicans (my apologies to any dirty Mexicans reading this page....where the hell'd you come from?).
In other news, France sucks ass. And does anyone else find this gut-wrenchingly disgusting?:
With all due respect to those with dissenting opinions concerning the war, I'd like to take everyone who shares the sentiments exhibited above and send them off to be tortured in Syria along with this Asan Akbar asshole. These people aren't Americans, they're treasonous, despicable human beings. May they rot in hell.
"You know the
world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer
is a black guy, The Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the
US of arrogance, and Germany doesn't want to go to war."
The DVD Zone is
no more. It was just too crazy to contain. For your DVD fix,
check the About the Author section.
Heeeeeeeeeey. What the hell is up in da hood? YEAH.
So, I'm in the midst of designing this unmanned aerial vehicle (UAV) that must be capable of splitting off into two distinct aircraft and then linking up once again--in midair. My design group's gotta write a formal paper on the subject and present it at the Symposium for Undergraduate Research in April--should be phat! Just thought I'd offer a glimpse into just what I do here at the college named "Most Asstastic" by US News & World Report (I think it was the July issue).
My other focus this semester is a balsa wood glider!
It's also colder than a glass of lemonade up here. We all found an inch (a freakin' inch!) of solid ice on the entirety of our cars. Eight broken scrapers later, the ice is still there. If you haven't already heard, I've obtained tickets for Pearl Jam in Buffalo on May 2nd. Tickets are going fast, there's a bunch of guys going from up here in Potsdam, as well as Ross and Danny boy (by the way, he's been updating his webpage on a regular basis now--but that simply means that he adds a tiny gif everyday, usually consisting of a squirrel's ear, which I might add, is the funniest thing I've seen in a month):
Also, I want to point out the wicked new DVD ZONE--wooo, it's crazy--it's a ZONE!!!!! Nothing says crazy like the word "ZONE!!!!!" YEEHAW!!!!
That's all for now, don't expect an update for a little while (and by "while" I mean a few days, not a few years--DAN!).
Oh yeah, I also added some tooltips to the menubar!!!! I'VE GONE CRAZY!!! WOOO!!
Yo-ho-ho and a
bottle of rum, mateys! In other news, I have recently acquired eight
(8) tickets for Pearl Jam on May 2nd at 7:30pm at HSBC Arena in balmy
Buffalo, NY. Any parties interested had best contact me soon.
It's gonna be phat!
Hey folks, back with another update. School's going well, can't complain there--I'm taking a crapload of electives so there ain't much work involved. Not as great on the job front. Between 9-11 and Columbia, I'm gettin' shafted for all the good jobs. I guess I should hope Saddam really screws up--it could mean big cash for me if Bush lays the hammer down.
I'll be heading
home this weekend for our February break to do some laundry. I'd
also be open to heavy drinking. Talk to you soon.
peoples. Pearl Jam's coming to Buffalo on May 2nd to HSBC; let me
know if you're interested ASAP.
PEARL JAM - MAY 2ND, 2003 - HSBC ARENA - BUFFALO, NY
Happy New Year! Hope everyone had a whizbang of a time over the holidays, I sure did and I'm sad to see them go. Awww. Anyway, I'm settled back up at school, ready for a slamtastic 21-credit semester, I can hardly wait. More importantly, this is my LAST semester here at Clarkson and it's gonna be time for the real world before I know what hit me. Time flies when you've taken a lot of naps. What?
Anyway, expect sporadic updates, as I'll have plenty of work to get done. Just to be safe, check back eight times daily so you won't miss a thing!
And Dan, I wanna see more progress with that damn webpage, taking naps is no excuse.
Just call me "The Rambler."
Well, both Ross AND Danny
Moskowitz have finally updated their webpages, so I find it necessary to
keep up with those two ass bandits. So here is a freakin' update,
|12-16-02 3:07am - Chanukah or Hanukkah?|
Well, I'm finally done with a long-ass semester, filled with all manner of "jolly" times. Exams, aircraft design projects that would make your head explode even if you didn't bash it with a sledgehammer beforehand, and of course, the absolutely, downright lovely administration of Clarkson University. What more could you want? (I'm not going to elaborate)
Anyway, I'm back home in EA, ready to return to the vortex that is Tops Friendly Markets. Pacino was right, they'll pull you back in every time. I do, however, look forward to some quality time with the Jimmys and the newly constructed potato gun. And don't forget Chugger Ray, just thinking of his friendly visage makes me misty.
In site-related news, I'm tweaking it as aforementioned, comments are welcome.
AND WHO IS JAYMAN?? Happy Holidays.
looking for the secret page!"
Yo, check out the new style, yo.
Tweaking to come...
Wudup peeps. Fresh back from
Thanksgiving break, oh there are so many stories to tell: Chugger Ray,
rolling an Explorer, firing potatoes at Chugger Ray...ah, the fun never
stopped. Get those pics up, Ross!
Wudup peeps. Fresh back from
Thanksgiving break, oh there are so many stories to tell: Chugger Ray,
rolling an Explorer, firing potatoes at Chugger Ray...ah, the fun never
stopped. Get those pics up, Ross!
I have been contacted by Jayman and I have become convinced that he and Chugger Ray are one and the same, or maybe just siblings (or maybe even the long lost Chugger Jim?). More as the investigation develops...
|11-19-02 7:54pm "this broken wheel is coming undone"|
If you haven't bought Riot Act
yet, then get your lazy ass out of your chair and get to a store near you.
It rocks the house morning, noon, and night. Also, go buy Conan on
DVD. Arnold's audio commentary doesn't quite top the "lamentations of
the weoeoeooeomen" speech, but it's pretty close.
In other news, I'll be home next week for some fat turkey! Let's pick it up a bit on the QotW, foos! I've had half a response so far. UNACCEPTABLE. Jayman, where are you?
Has anyone seen the newly-banned
footage of the skiing camel??? Stay tuned, I'm staging an infiltration
into the vault. You'll see it here first if I make it out alive.
I'm sitting here at my computer,
attempting to finish a design report...but I don't think it's gonna get
Anyway, Ross, I'm sorry to hear about the crabs. Have you tried Manchu Wok? It's right next to Ted's Hot Dogs.
And don't forget about the Fischer.Net 2,141st Visitor Grand Prize Sweepstakes! Be the 2,141st hit on my site and you'll win an all-inclusive, all expenses paid vacation to Barbados, along with $2,141 spending cash! (employees and anyone who has ever come to this website is not eligible, see contest rules for eligibility requirements, no purchase necessary)
Did I forget to mention that Riot Act comes out today?
Also, I should note that the
Secret Page has been updated once again. Happy hunting...
|11-4-02 7:18pm Short Attention Span Theater|
Shitstorm now over. WOO.
Anyway, things are fan-freakin-tastic, as always. I've had a great semester so far, full of doin' crack and smokin' J's! No, but seriously, did anyone tape Letterman last Friday? I really wanted to catch Don Rickles in action and I missed it. DAMN IT! In other news, we had a sweet Halloween party in the basement of the bar last Thursday, I dressed as a commando. That's right, no underpants for me.
I'll be home for Thanksgiving, we needs to be planning the annual football game (i.e. Dannyboy start lining stuff up). Anybody wanna go to the Bills game that weekend??? I don't know if they're home or not, let me know if interested and we'll work it out. Hope all is well with everyone, haven't heard from anybody in a while. I guess that means you're spending too much time browsing the site. Speaking of which, I updated the calendar.
I'm gonna go take a nap.
Shitstorm of the century is underway...I'll let you know how things go in about a month...and don't ask in the meantime...
Redid the Pearl Jam page; enjoy--I
know I did! I know, I know, you can't wait for an update to the Tom
Clancy page. Well, fear not, it's on the way.
Howdy, back with a brief but
oh-so-important update. I've got a progress report on the ole' job
search, got me an interview next week with Lockheed Martin; wish me luck.
I'll write more after my nap...
Also, keep in mind that when
responding to the QotW, the "answers" must elicit a guffaw on my part.
Anything less will be thrown in the trash!
not adjust your television set...
Moved old postings to Archive.
In other news:
Album art for Riot Act added to PJ page.
Gonna be home Thursday night...party at Bossman's!
Added some phat pics to the Image Gallery!
In other news, I received this reply from the enigmatic "Jayman:"
Re: 9/14/02 - WHO IS JAYMAN?????????????!! I am. Simply stated. Some guy from the East Aurora area who was tipped off to your site from Ross's site. I was tipped off to Ross's site back when it was cool. Before it sucked. Who am I really? Some guy, particularly THAT GUY. Not to be confused with "THE MAN." You know how it is... You the man! No! You the man! How could I possibly be the man when you the man!?!?! That's because I'm "that guy." That's why, when people walk up to be, they say, "Hey! You're THAT GUY!" Yes I am. Do you know me? Probably not. Have you ever seen me? Yes you probably have. And I probably scared you. Ha! That's who JayMan is. Ask nicely and I'll give you an eMail address to me. L8r.
The plot thickens...please,
send me your e-mail, JayMan.
Who's gonna be home the 27th thru the 1st???
Website renovations coming soon
(I'm getting bored)...
Speaking of skunks, after having a
few pops last night, I noticed a skunk in our backyard. Well, of
course, you know what happened next. I rummaged through our sports
equipment, found a bocce ball, and proceeded to chuck it at the skunk.
Ross, skunks can spray about four feet, I've estimated.
In other news, check out the PJ section, you can check out the track listing for Riot Act as well as take a listen to the first single off the album, 'I Am Mine.' Enjoy.
WHO IS JAYMAN?????????!!
God bless America.
"Riot Act" coming November
|9-9-02 - Cookin' hot dogs on the sidewalk|
Hey folks, it is damn hot up here
in Potsdam. Sorry I couldn't make it to the Jones Estate on Saturday,
I trust everyone is heavily bruised from frozen hot dogs and that at least
seven plastic chairs were broken and subsequently burned. Yeah, um,
Anyway, I'm gonna
be busy this semester with frat stuff, coursework, and of course, finding a
damn job (if there happen to be any astronauts or senior
aeronautical/aerospace engineers reading this page, gimme a call and gimme
big cash), so I won't have an abundance of time to devote to this little web
venture of mine--AH, my leg itches--so be patient. The QotW may have
to become the QotWIFLI (figure it out), so to whoever Ross' mad arch-nemesis
may be, you'll just have to shut up and deal, yo! Peace out.
Finally back at school...stay tuned...
Just saw "Mulholland Drive" last
night. Holy crap. Go rent it. I'm not necessarily
recommending it as a "good" film, but I think I can guarantee that you'll be
thinking about it for days afterward (if you have any intellectual curiosity
whatsoever). In other words, it's f**ked up, yo!
|8-4-02 - Sony is Japanese for "large man who eats bikes"|
Yeah, so we had this family
reunion today at my house and DAMN, did we have some good eats.
Summer's drawing to a close, so those of you yearning to do something of a wizzbang best start plannin'. I'm heading back on the 19th, but may return for the Jones Slam-o-Rama Graduation Party at the Jones' Estate starring Jones of the Jones Estate. I think it'll be a great time, as I'm sure there's gonna be a buncha MILFs there, as someone may attest to.
In other news, I got a receiver to add another piece to my "home theater entertainment life-sustaining" system. So, now I can hear explosions, car chases, and sidesplitting comedy at an ear-shattering 8,000 decibels (with phat bass!). Swing by and check it, yo! If anyone would like to donate a widescreen HDTV for seven dollars, just load up the truck and bring it by.
Anyway, hope you're having a
good summer, I'm not!
So, I says to dis guy, "Hey, that's not a llama to
be trifled with!" Indeed.
Just added a Tom Clancy page; don't expect much
interest, but hey--eat it! Red Rabbit due out August 5th!
I just had some chicken wings.
Moved some entries to the archive;
link to NYC Trip Report now on About the Author page.
As far as who won the
aforementioned staredown, I'm still too shaken to talk more about it...
I was just locked in an intense staredown with a
squirrel for nearly five minutes.
New Pearl Jam album in November! Yeehaw!
Check my PJ page for all the latest info.
|6-23-02 - False Enthusiasm!!!|
NYC Trip Report revised!!! Now with
improved grammar, diction, and even more hilarious comments,
Ross, Dan, Martha et al: what's the deal with our "Trip Across America" in August? Is this being planned or are we just going to "let it happen?" (i.e. do nothing and hope an RV drops out of the sky?)
Hell froze over, I got a cell
Small update to
NYC Trip Report; see if you can find it.
|6-17-02 - UPDATE|
NYC Trip Report is now up and running for your browsing
No, the trip report is not up yet,
I am working diligently...waiting on Bossman for those pics, dammit!
You sumbitch! Occupy yourself with the Question of the Week while you
people are waiting--I want some quality responses this time! (although
'JEBUS!' ain't bad)
I've created the first archive of posts on this, the main page. You
can find the link at the bottom of dis page. Ciao.
|6-15-02 - What about monkeys?|
Well, I'm back from a great trip
to NYC to see Letterman on Thursday evening...just in time to go paint for a
jerk! Stay tuned for an extensive trip report!
|6-6-02 - Jebus?|
I am damn excited because I
recently became the proud recipient of two (2) tickets to Letterman for next
Thursday...YEE-HAW! I'll be heading to NYC Thursday morning with
Bossman and we plan to cause some trouble (although I have to be back to
work on friday). Anyway, I'll have an extensive update after I get
back, count on that.
I redid the links page, I hope
you enjoy them, I know I did.
This is not a joke, but I think you'll find it
amusing nonetheless: there were two woodchucks just chasing each other
all over my backyard moments ago...
Just got back from seeing The Sum
of All Fears. As a devout Tom Clancy fan, I was happy to see another
of his novels on the big screen. And while I have nothing but disdain
for Ben "Prettyboy" Affleck, he did alright and it was a great movie.
Go see it. Now. I should also mention that Dan stepped on some
woman's feet because she wouldn't move when we tried to get to our seats...
"Go pick up those paint chips."
A simple task, am I right? Apparently not, as the "shady" dude on my
paint crew I referred to in past updates could not figure out just how to
pick up said paint chips. I don't know, maybe I didn't ask it
properly. Maybe I should have said, "Hey Gomer, see that shit that
fell off the house when we scraped it five seconds ago? Yeah, those
are paint chips...open your hand and grasp them firmly, then raise them into
the air and deposit them in the garbage." Or maybe I should have said,
"PJ...HEY...PJ, pick up dem chips." I don't know, but about the
seventh or eighth time I asked this kid to do it, I decided it was time for
him to go home so we could get some work done. A fantastic end to a
mindblowing day. (tell me, is it me? did I not ask him right?)
"Squirrels are very adept
swimmers, crossing lakes and rivers with ease."
|5-27-02 - I'm a staunch supporter of the Hot Dog Socioeconomic Theory|
graduation party yesterday was great fun, although I was very disappointed
by the lack of both hot dogs and Jim Beam. Ah well, there's always
next year...wait, no. I'm anxiously awaiting Ross posting pictures of
the event, so that I can doctor them and put people in compromising
positions that will make them feel uncomfortable for years to come.
I'm gonna go steam some franks now.
Ross, I'm still waiting for your answer on the identity of that mysterious being in the picture below...is it Mindy the Hutt (Jabba's lesser-known 3rd cousin)?
OOOOOOHHH DOCTA CHATTAS!!!
|5-25-02 - Cannonball Run|
Ross, who the f is this?
The 80% of the picture to the right of the individual in question is provided here solely for your amusement.
In other news:
And remember, always bet on Lucky
Lindy in the seventh race!
|5-22-02 - Ask Sherwin-Williams|
Added some pictures, yee-haw.
In other news, Wolfpack did NOT
come through, so I shan't be working at Moog this summer. Instead,
I'll be painting fascia, hard soffits, easy 3 doors, and siding (I be
paintin' hooses!). I'm referring to the CollegePro job I got as a job
site manager/foreman. I've got a crew of 2 working for me (one of them
is VERY shady) and we get a new job/house each week. We'll be working
four 10-hour days per week on average, so I'll get friday, saturday and
sunday off. Which is great; more time for weekend grabass! We just
finished our first job in 2.5 days, so we're doing well, except for the fact
that I am permanently covered in blue, white and gray paint (GO LIONS).
I'll try to rustle up some amusing anecdotes from the job for your enjoyment
as the summer drags on (especially ones involving the aforementioned "shady"
|5-19-02 - He reads from a card!|
|5-16-02 - Attack of the Clones kicked my ass!|
Just got back from the midnight show of Attack of the Clones. I give
it eight stars out of two. All I've gotta say is that Yoda is a
freakin' little badass jedi monkey! Woo! I was going nuts when I
saw that dude spinning around in the air, going nuts like nothing I've ever
seen--no, not even a ninja could kick Yoda's ass! Anyway, get off your
butt and go see this movie, it'll slap you silly six ways to Sunday.
I think Ross has a few pics up on his page so take a look at those to see just how the evening went.
In other news, "mesa Aunt Jar
Jar-mimah!" and "Oh man, Attack of the Previews!"
|5-10-02 - New e-mail|
ATTENTION: new e-mail address,
please send all future rants, raves, praise, and other correspondence to
that address, thank you for your cooperation.
5-4-02 - home for the summer
Wudup hombres; all future updates and rants will appear on
this page, just for ease of navigation. The "Discourse on Human Evolution"
will now appear in this area as well.
Well, I'm finally home after a grueling semester of work and television. Lemme know when you get home, because I be bored. I've been taking pictures of everything I could think of and thrown it up in the Image Gallery, take a look. I'll be updating a bunch more so stay tuned...
In other news, I had an interview with Moog at 730 this morning, seemed to go well. We'll see if I get the job next week. If that falls through, I've got a job as a Job Site Manager with CollegePro (read: I get to tell people how to paint!). P.J.?...hey...hey...HEY...HEY...HEY!
In yet even more news: YEAH!